Rowyn (rowyn) wrote,
Rowyn
rowyn

Masquerade

Jimmy tried to talk me into entering the masquerade. I never have at ConQuest, though last year at Contraception I stood for ten seconds in front of the judges there, like half the rest of the con that year. The con's theme was "superheroes". It was the most popular theme I've ever seen.

My outfits aren't really costumes, with a "theme" or a "I'm supposed to be X" plan to them. I don't have a thirty-second routine I could perform for the entertainment of the crowd. And most masquerades are more about your "act" than your costume. Jimmy tried to argue that I didn't need an act. I dunno. Maybe I'll take him up on it next year.

The masquerade this year was the most fun of any masquerade I've attended. Only seven costumes entered, and all were played for laughs, which is typical of ConQuest. The first pair to go on had Ghostbuster costumes, complete with very elaborate backpacks and a ghosttrap. They came in to the very catchy "Ghostbuster" song and billed themselves "Ghostbuster 2.2". I would've given them the award for best costume. There was a "Major Pooch" costume that made me think of Elise, though she had a huge dog's head mask--the mascot kind where the eyes are in the mouth--that I didn't really like.

I wonder if I remember them all? A group of three children in robes and pointed hats came on as the "Young Magicians Corps of America" and danced briefly to "YMCA", which was funny. One entrant did "Amidala Barbie": she came in carrying her box around her, and the MC opened it for her to cries of "Don't! You'll ruin the resale value!" from the audience. The box said "Batteries not included" and she was billed as a talking Barbie, speaking "famous lines" from the movie. I'll repeat them here with a big space around them to avoid accidental spoilers. You can skip to the "end spoilers" mark it if you don't want to see.
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Star Wars: Attack of the Clones SPOILER!
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Delivered in Barbie-doll, breathlessly stupid, voice:

"Oh Anakin, I've died a little every day since you've returned." I hadn't seen the movie yet at the time I saw this, and I thought this line must be a joke. Everyone roared with laughter. It's a direct quote.

"Being a Senator is HARD!" This one was just a joke.

"Anakin's not a jedi, he's just a padawan." This one was a real quote, too, though I think she paraphrased it a bit, and I paraphrased her again.

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END SPOILERS
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She had the best act of any of them, though the final set came close. (This is also about SW, but it has absolutely nothing to do with any of the movies) The ConQuest masquerade always has the same large group of people enter as one "costume", and it's always one giant joke with minimal costuming involved. In this case, it started with two jedi "costumes" (consisting of drapery to suggest robes, and light sabers), dueling to settle the age-old question: *clash, clash* "Tastes great!" *clash* "Less filling!" Then they united against the new threat of the clones: cue a line of about nine people carrying small, cardboard-cutout sheep, labeled Dolly 1 through 8, with the exception of the one labeled "Baa-baa Fett." Yes, it was that bad.

That's five. Hmm. Still trying to remember the other two. Oh, there was a Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy duo. The Harley Quinn outfit was dead-on, complete with the bounding leaps and blown kisses by the woman wearing it. The Poison Ivy costume looked off--I don't know, maybe it was from one of the Ivy incarnations I haven't seen, but she was wearing a green satin boustier with green satin capris. She had little ivy leaves in her hair that looked nice, though. They came on stage, looked around, said, "I don't think this is the Greenpeace meeting," and left.

I can't remember the last costume. Ah well, it'll be on the KCSFFS webpage eventually. The entertainment planned for the intermission while the judges made their decisions hadn't shown up (a fact noted by Jimmy earlier with great distress). The MC had saved his pre-show filler for the half-time in response, and passed the twenty minutes or so telling jokes. Surprisingly good jokes, at that. Everyone laughed. The halftime entertainment, thre belly dancers, finally showed and were setting up when the judges returned with their decisions. Everyone got an award, tailored to their costume. The best-in-show went to the Amidala doll. The bellydancers performed afterwards. Quite a few people stayed to watch.

I was impressed by the dancers. They performed to several rock-pop songs, including "Don't Pay the Ferryman," a favorite of mine in my MTV days seventeen or so years ago, and "Forever May Not Be Long Enough", an eerily compelling song. Despite the contemporary music, they danced traditionally, with that particular grace that makes you think "how do they do that?" Arms and torsos that glide like snakes. Maybe I should take that as a hobby.

I stayed to chat with them afterwards. At one point, the thinnest of the women was complaining about her stomach, which I thought was amazingly funny (as far as I could tell, she didn't have one.) "You're a bellydancer. Aren't you supposed to be over that?" She agreed.

Afterwards, I went back to the party floor and did the circuit. I was wearing my "Mousewoman" costume, which is about the only one I have that has a personality attached. Something about wearing it makes me go goofy. Mousewoman talks in a childlike voice, alternating between petulant stubborness ("I am not a rat!"), timidity ("Aaaaa! You have cat earrings!") and false bravado ("I am Mousewoman, Caped Crusader!") I went to the LA Worldcon party and was directed to the cheese platter, which I sat in front of (hiding from the woman with cat earrings), nibbling and listening to two fans SMOFing in one corner.

Eventually I stood, said, "Thank you for the cheese!" Pause. 'You're all out of Swiss now. I thought you should know." Pause. "My work here is done! Bye!"

I changed one more time that night, had an impromptu photo shoot with one of my regular photographers, and a couple of others who came by and snapped shots off. (Mousewoman, sadly, wasn't that popular a subject for the camera people, but hopefully I'll get a shot or two back to show) Then I went back to the LA party room to sit next to the portable oven (they were making homeade pretzels and cinnamon rolls every half hour in it) and get warm. The hotel, as a whole, was much too cold for my tastes. At about midnight, I went back to my room, telling one person, "I'm either going to bed or to get changed, I'm not sure which yet." Once back, I opted for bed.

Sunday morning, I woke at about seven, read some more of The Tower of Fear, tried to go back to sleep, and was disturbed by a clueless housekeeper repeatedly knocking on the door at 8AM. After fifteen or twenty knocks and several "Housekeeping!" cries, she finally went away, shortly before I checked to make sure that, yes, not only was the door bolted but the "Do Not Disturb" sign was hung on the knob. Sigh. Mind you, the "Do Not Disturb" sign had been out since I got to the hotel 30 hours ago, but you'd think the combination of "I can't get in because the door is bolted" and "It's 8AM" would've tipped the woman off that I did not want my room cleaned at that particular time Even if she didn't believe the sign. Sheesh. I hope the con switches hotels again. Note to self: complain to hotel management and to con staff.

Not much else to report about the con for Sunday. Checkout was at noon and I left at 11:30, though Trask offered to cart my stuff away and come back for me later. But I wasn't expecting anything else to happen, and I was tired.

At home, I read and napped for several hours, surprising myself, since I hadn't gone all that short on sleep at the con. At 10:45PM, we went to see the new Star Wars movie, finally. There's a digital screen--one of twenty or so in the country--at a theatre half an hour from our apartment, and we went there to watch it. I figured it would be cool, since the movie was shot digitally. Both Lut and I had low expectations of the film, and were pleasantly surprised to find it enjoyable. Not brilliant or great art, but entertaining. The ending disappointed me: it didn't seem to end so much as stop. "Whoops! Look at the time! Gotta go here." I think the one thing that impressed me, more than anything else, was how much Obi-Wan Kenobi reminded me of the Obi-Wan from the original Star Wars. I felt not merely like I was watching the same character, but even the same actor--quite a feat. Admitedly, it's been years since I last watched the movie, but nonetheless.

Home again, and more Tower of Fear. Which I think I will read some more of now, too. Bye!
Tags: cons. life
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