Rowyn (rowyn) wrote,

August in Review

I've been eating a healthier dinner lately (featuring actual vegetables!) and maybe eating slightly less junkfood. Very slightly. I may've lost a pound or two. Not clear.

I've been working on a third novella for my untitled Paradise collection. It went okay for the first 20% or so, but has really bogged down on a case of I Don' Wanna. I haven't given up: technically I keep adding a little to it every day. But it is only crawling along.

It is basically impossible for me to distinguish between "this is a terrible idea and I should give up" and "this is fine and you're just being afflicted by typical writing blahs". Maybe I should run it by some beta readers. Anyone want to read about 10,000 words of unfinished novella and an outline of the rest? And also possibly listen to me whinge on about my uncertainties?

The Business of Writing
There are some business-y things I should do, like flesh out my author profiles in various places and link them to the places I am actually active (ie, LJ and Twitter). And update my LJ profile to mention that oh yeah I wrote a book.

I have not done any of these. I have been mostly trying to produce my next book instead. And not doing a great job of it.

I did some headers. Apparently a month's worth, because I still have three weeks of buffer left, just like I did at the end of July.

I did a couple of drawings at Panera, too.

Gaming Still tending my virtual garden in ARK, still playing boardgames with terrycloth and alinsa on weeknights. Not much else. I think wistfully about roleplay, either starting a new game or trying to revive one of my dead games, but I am pretty sure I don't have the energy/commitment for it.

I barely left the house this month, outside of work. I only made it Panera once to draw, even.

I am depressed. You can probably tell this from the rest of the update. One might argue that I am depressed because of my progress or lack thereof: dissatisfied with story, not enough art, not enough gaming, whatever. I suspect the converse is more accurate: I'm not getting as much done and not as happy about it because I am depressed. Maybe I am sad because RA's sales are slowing down. It's possible. It seems more likely that I am sad because my brain does that sometimes, and while my brain likes to come up with explanations other than "because chemistry", that does not make them true.

I've been down for much of the month. Today is better than the last few days have been. (Yay, weekend!) But the last three weeks or so have been a struggle. This last week in particular I've been hitting the "I don't want to do anything so I might as well be at work" point. All I want to do is sleep. Or possibly eat a gallon of ice cream.

Anyway. I've gotten past the "let's pretend this isn't happening and maybe it will stop" stage, and now I am going through the "let's acknowledge it but try not to dwell on it" stage.

All shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well.

Tags: life, nyr, nyr 2015
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